I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
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