you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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