My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
send nudes
from the living room?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
