"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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