my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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