people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize