I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
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