The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Randomize
