google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize