Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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