he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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