i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm having to shit out rocks
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
