Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
