What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
