I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
