I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Randomize
