The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I could fuck to npr.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize