This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
