I have demons in me.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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