We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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