I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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