I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
