I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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