Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
