god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
