At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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