Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
