we have pet lesbian snakes
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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