wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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