well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
