Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
