So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
no, he came in my armpit
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
