so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
