Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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