:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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