I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
