Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
