Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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