the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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