2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize