before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize