it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
