His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
