we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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