dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize