Cold hands, warm shart.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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