i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
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