Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
