i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
this will be a night to untag.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
