the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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