Its about making memories worth repressing
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
