i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
