I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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