Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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